55. Create cause and effect and Co-commentary sentences

55.Create Cause and Effect and Co-commentary sentences:

all good analytical writing will cue the reader as to the logical consequences of one’s claims. By using the cause and effect starters, you will be able to signal to your reader that because of the logic embedded in the previous sentence or sentences, you are now going to add either a conclusion to this logic or additional evidence that will lead to a more nuanced and robust claim.

In the analysis paragraph below, the cause and effect starters are in bold:

Having already been introduced to the awe-inspiring Satan, the reader meets Milton’s God for the first time. God seems to be passive, since Milton introduces God, sitting in his throne in Heaven looking down on his beauteous creations. In His seemingly bland speech, explaining what will become of Adam and Eve, God says:

By some false guile pervert; and shall pervert;

For man will hearken to his glozing lies,

And easily transgress the sole Command,

Sole pledge of his obedience: So will fall

He and his faithless Progeny: whose fault?

Whose but his own? Ingrate, he had of me

All he could have; I made him just and right,

Sufficient to have stood, though free to fall.

(III, 92-99)

At this point in the epic poem, God is speaking to his Son, Christ, in heaven. God speaks of what will happen to mankind and how they will fall. Milton intends for this speech to seem overwhelmingly boring to the common reader; however, we must understand that God’s speech is boring because God has foreknowledge and is omniscient and therefore there is no surprise or shock in God’s tone. Moreover, because Milton ingeniously has the reader question God because God’s language and tone are seemingly condescending, he shows how easily man slips away from revering God. When the reader realizes that God is speaking and they are “glazing over” His unappealing speech, and views Him as inactive and passive, the reader questions God. Consequently, perceiving God in this manner proves that we are fallen and have little or no faith in God. This is precisely the point Milton wanted to make to his readers. He wants us to beware of ourselves.

CAUSE AND EFFECT STARTERS:

-Moreover, __________________________________________________.

-Consequently, __________________________________________________.

-As a result, __________________________________________________.

-Hence, __________________________________________________.

-Therefore, __________________________________________________.

-Thus, __________________________________________________.

-Furthermore, __________________________________________________.

-In addition, __________________________________________________.

-In fact, __________________________________________________.

-So too __________________________________________________.

-Indeed, __________________________________________________.

-So, __________________________________________________.

LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES TO YOUR ARGUMENT:

-It follows that ___________________________________.

-My conclusion, then, is that _________________________________________.

Create co-commentary sentences:

Co-commentary or meta-commentary tells the reader how to interpret previous statements or future statements; it is commentary on your commentary that clarifies how the reader should think or not think about your claims. Good writers use co-commentary in order to:

-distinguish your views from others

-anticipate and answer objections to your claims

-address the controversial nature of your claims

-guide interpretation of your analysis

-clarify your position and its connection to your thesis

-reinforce your point in less formal and more colloquial language (see conflation co-commentary)

For example, in this analysis paragraph on The River Why, the co-commentary starters are in bold:

At first the w-h-y in the river taunted Gus and showed him that he was nothing but Gus soon learns the true meaning of the w-h-y when he discovers that the river is not questioning him, but is simply part of a whole. Gus summarizes, “ the Tamanawis was not questioning. It was sculpting and painting and humming seaward with all it touched and fed and carried and concealed, singing, This-all of this-is w-h-y.” (Duncan 251). Gus discovers that the river is shaped like the word why because that is the way it has to be shaped in order to sustain the life and lives it is responsible for. When Gus has his raven experience, in which he has vision that he is a raven flying over the Tamanawis River, he discovers how everything is interconnected and part of a whole. In other words, Gus realizes that nature simply is and does not question its existence and that the world could not be otherwise. This develops Gus’s faith in the world. He finally sees nature and the environment from a nature’s perspective and discovers the answer to the w-h-y in the river. This helps Gus to become more aware of his actions, how they effect the world around him, and how he should be respectful of nature.

“CO-COMMENTARY” STARTERS TO USE:

FOR CLARIFICATION:

-In other words, _________________________________________.

-That is, _______________________________________________________.

-To put it another way, _________________________________________.

-To put it bluntly, _________________________________________.

-To put it succinctly, _________________________________________.

-The essential point is __________________________________.

-My point is not that _________________________, but that ___________________.

-What the author really means is ___________________________________.

-Although some readers may object that ______________________________, one should focus upon ____________________________.

-To repeat, ______________________________________________________.

-In short, __________________________________________________________.

-To be exact, _____________________________________________________.

-To be specific, ___________________________________________________.

-To be precise, _____________________________________________________.

-More specifically, ____________________________________________________.

-More precisely, __________________________________________________.

TO INDICATE THE IMPORTANCE OF YOUR CLAIMS:

-Essentially, _________________________________.

-Even more important, _________________________________________.

-Less important is the notion that _____________________________________.

-Above all else _________________________________________.

- Ultimately, _________________________________________.

-Create Conflation Starters:

to conflate means to combine or connect. Conflation starters bring together both formal language and colloquial language-words used in everyday speech. Similar to co-commentary starters, conflation starters clarify a previous point. The difference is that co-commentary starters clarify a point by using formal or academic discourse, and conflation starters clarify a point by using everyday language. Many analytical essay writers complain that academic writing forces them to write in a tone and in expressions that mute their own voice. By first stating your claims in formal or what some call academic discourse and then restating these claims in colloquialisms, you kill two birds with one stone. You emphasize your point by restating it and you allow your voice to be heard by using language readily available to you and your audience. Remember- you do not write these essays for your teacher; you write these essays for a peer who has read the text but needs help understanding its significance. By using the conflation starters you will be able to be exact in your analysis while still maintaining your voice.

For example, read the analytical paragraph on The River Why below and notice how the conflation starters in bold allow the writer to clarify a claim in colloquial language. Notice how the formal “outcast” becomes the colloquial “loser” and how “excessive self-love” becomes “self-absorbed, hippy freak.”

Early in his life, Gus becomes somewhat of an outcast by rejecting those around him; this causes him to become victim to too much self-love and solitude. In other words, because Gus embraces his dorkiness, he become s a complete loser. Gus ignores his peers in his high school years after being voted “Most-Out-Of It, leading him to become isolated; his parents remain unconcerned because he passes the only known “intelligence test” in the family, skillful fishing. Gus develops his self-love and creates what he calls “The Ideal Schedule” to maximize his fishing time and satisfy himself. Gus eliminates all non-fishing activities, moves alone to the Tamanawis River and isolates himself completely from society and any human interaction even if it is discussing angling to be able to fish 14 hours per day. However, Gus realizes the painful reality of his Ideal Schedule. He understands that too much of a good thing is exhausting and that they key to enjoying anything is to avoid doing whatever it is all of the time. Gus expresses this when he states, “I learned that not fishing is crucial to the enjoyment of fishing: fishing is a good thing, but too much of a good thing is a bad thing.” (Duncan 56) At this point in his life Gus has rejected his parents and has been following his schedule of self-love for some time. Gus is trying to understand why he is so depressed. With too much fishing, constant seclusion, and excessive self-love, Gus is far from becoming a native, as he is not involving himself with any of his surroundings. Without a doubt, Gus has become self-absorbed, hippy freak. However, this changes as Gus realizes that he needs to hang up the “Ideal Schedule” and spend less time pleasing himself.

CONFLATION STARTERS:

-In other words, _____________________________________________.

-That is, _______________________________________________________.

-To put it another way, _________________________________________.

-To put it bluntly, _________________________________________.

-To put it succinctly, _________________________________________.

-To be frank, _____________________________________________________.

-To be honest, ___________________________________________________.

-At the risk of oversimplifying, _______________________________________.

-In short, ____________________________________________________.

-More precisely, _____________________________________________________.

-Without a doubt, ___________________________________________________.